,If you followed my blog from the beginning you know that Mr. Reinvention and I have been married for eons. We got married very young (21 and 23) by today’s standards and at this point in our lives have shared more time together than with any other humans.
Our marriage has seen its share of ups and downs. Having essentially grew up together we had a lot of self discovering to do, individually and as a couple. We have worked diligently on dumping the baggage we came to each other with and becoming who we wanted to become as people, partners and parents. Mr. Reinvention and I fit together like two puzzle pieces. We are very different, but together, we fit. We enjoy each other immensely.
But life is life and sometimes responsibilities and obligations get in the way of quality time together. Sexual spontaneity dwindled as our daughter grew older. Sex became another item we had to pencil in weekly.
I don’t recall where, but recently I learned about a “30 Day Sex Pact” and mulled it over a bit. I wasn’t necessarily sold so I kept it in the back of my mind to further consider and discuss with Mr. Reinvention. I wasn’t sure if it would foster closeness or become just another tic on the “To Do” list to mark off. I didn’t want to create pressure to perform for either of us. So I sat on the idea.
Eventually, the pact circled back around to the forefront of my mind and I brought it up to Mr. Reinvention. We chatted and set some parameters to alleviate any performance pressure and just make the act about connection, fun and love. We decided to give it a go.
We are beyond the initial 30 days and let me tell you, daily sex is here to stay! Beyond the physical pleasure, it has created a deeper level of intimacy while creating levity and proximity in our daily interactions. To be fair and honest, there have been days where one of us requests a raincheck. But overall we have been going strong.
Here are some of the ways I feel daily sex has improved our relationship:
- We are more playful with each other outside of the bedroom.
- It has broken the mundane routine of daily life that we all get stuck in.
- I feel beautiful, sexy and desired by my partner of 20 years, still.
- I feel in a better mood during the day.
- I feel happier.
- We have a deeper level of connection and intimacy promoting more affection and communication.
- Great sex without the pressure to perform in a certain way or for a certain amount of time.
- I feel closer to my life partner and feel like we are a better team.
- All of the benefits have a trickle down effect into every other area of our lives.
I never would have imagined all of these benefits from daily sex. I know that may sound silly. But I thought our sexual regularity was “enough” for us. So we are keeping the aim for daily sex in our routine. I just wish I would have suggested implementing it sooner.
How important is sex in your relationships?